Chicken Schnitzel - Because everything tastes good crumbed and fried right?

Well maybe not everything tastes better crumbed and fried, but many things do, and this includes chicken

breasts. I almost never buy chicken breasts, tending to favour thighs, for flavour and price reasons, but I wanted to try out a sexy looking recipe involving stuffing the skin of chicken breasts with nduja. So like a complete moron I bought skinless ones by accident. I was genuinely annoyed I couldn't make what I had planned, but then I remembered the old classic Schnitzel. The method of bashing the hell out of the poor unwanted chicken breast, covering it with bread crumbs and frying, keeps the chicken moist and delicious. Apart from using lots of plates, it's very quick, great for week-time suppers when the last thing you want to be doing is faffing around the kitchen with some complicated recipe best saved for an idle Saturday.

Feeds two. Take two unwanted (or indeed wanted) skinless chicken breasts, and between two sheets of clingfilm, bash like you've never bashed before. You want the finished article to be no thicker than 2cm.  Choose your weapon wisely, a thick rolling pin works well, as does an empty wine bottle. You could use a meat tenderiser too, I just remembered I had one and will be using that next time. Doh. Have one shallow bowl at the ready and lightly whisk an egg into it. Put a handful of seasoned flour on a plate, and on a third plate put a couple of handfuls of bread crumbs mixed with a tbsp chopped thyme leaves and the chopped zest of a lemon. Heat up a non-stick frying pan and add a tbsp olive oil. Meanwhile take one steam-rollered breast, dip first in the egg, then the flour and finally the breadcrumbs, making sure you have good crumby coverage. Over a medium heat fry this bad boy, not forgetting about the other one. They only take about 4 minutes each side so do watch that they don't burn, golden is the aim, not charcoal. Flip over once golden and fry the other side. Serve with something green and maybe some spuds* of some description. Really nice with a squirt of lemon.

You could do this with pork loin, or veal would be great too. Just make sure there is lots of flavour in your breadcrumbs, don't burn it and you can't go wrong. 

*I asked the Boyfriend if he wanted some sort of carbs with dinner and he said 'What are carbs?' Oh to be a boy!

When Hunger Strikes...eat these seeded crisp breads

Birdseed never looked so good

When me and my two sisters were at school, unless my Mum had delicious meanwhiles* to subdue our pre-pubescent hunger, there was literally hell to pay. I would get stroppy, middle sister would have what can only be described as a rather petrifying fit of fury, and the little one would sob her eyes out in disbelief. Poor Mum. Usually we got iced buns or lardy cakes from Reeves (a brilliant chain of bakeries located in the South West of England) but on the occasion that she presented us with a crappy packet of digestives there were problems. Not a great deal has changed since then, I don't have babies to feed yet, but I do have a boyfriend who periodically screeches at me, eyes pleading, beak open, demanding food. When his blood sugar levels drop he gets hangry. A subject I find great amusement in discussing with little sister, as one of her besties can transform in the same way, a Jeckyl and Hyde moment. These specimens must be fed immediately.

I, however, do not suffer from hanger. Instead, when I get in from work, starving and desperate for food, I tend to pick away at the fridge until that nagging emptiness is gone. This is a terrible thing to do for several reasons: it undoes all the good work I have done at Bikram, I nearly always have cheese in the fridge which is what I grab first, and then I'm not that hungry for ages so we eat later than we should. At Christmas, the Boyfriend's Mum gave me some of these seeded crisp-breads that she'd made, and holy moly are they good for those just-got-in-from-work-need-a-nibble-now moments. Savoury and crunchy and delicious they fill the gap before dinner is ready. The funniest thing is that the Boyfriend won't touch them, as they are 'full of bird seed' so he has to make do with the minging multi-pack of baked crisps he bought by accident, thinking they were normal Walker's. Ha.

This makes a huge batch but they will keep in tupperware, and I'm going to bring some to my friend's house later when we go over for dinner. She's preggers so I thought it would be a nice change from a bottle of Schloer.

Preheat the oven to 200c. Mix the following in a large bowl: 100g each of porridge oats, sesame seeds, linseeds (yeah I know! I've never eaten them either, just marvelled at the pretty blue fields of them in the summer), sunflower seeds and pumpkin seeds, 350g flour (any flour, go crazy, experiment), 1tsp baking powder and 1.5tsp salt. Now add 200ml water and 125ml oil (I used plain old vegetable oil) and mix really well, it will get quite stiff but do mix it up properly. Take a third of the mixture and roll it out between two large pieces of non-stick baking paper, you want roughly the thickness of Ryvita. Peel the top layer of paper off and cut into your desired shape. I went for rectangles. Original. Carefully place the sheet onto a baking tray and cook for about 15-20 minutes until slightly browned. Repeat with the rest of the mixture.

I reckon you could get pretty creative with these, maybe a little cayenne pepper or Parmesan or both? I look forward to playing with this recipe. It was entitled 'Linda's Delicious Crisp Bread' but I don't know Linda and the Boyfriend's Mum is called Brenda so they can be Brenda's.

These are seriously good warm from the oven, so that's your little treat as chef. In fact I ate so many that I didn't need lunch, much to the Boyfriend's horror, when I suggested he make himself cheese on toast for lunch. Cheese on toast for lunch? Perish the thought.

*a snack to tide one over until dinner time

Chickpea & Chorizo & Parsley Soup

No carrot & coriander here...

I completely mullered a pan of chickpeas the other day. I cooked them for so long they were pretty much ready made hummous by the time I remembered to drain them. My intention was to make a curry with them, but their sad soggy texture lent itself to one thing only, soup. I have a mean opinion of soup in general, for me it is for lunch, for when you're ill, to re-fuel with and warm up with, but not necessarily to excite. I find it baffling when people tell me how they made this 'amazing soup', what's that? You cooked some onions and garlic up, added veg, stock, boiled it and blended it? Well that just blows my mind. Except it doesn't. At all. This soup changed my mind a little, it's different, it has bulk and what are essentially meaty croutons (yesssss) and beats boring old leek and potato any day. It's based on a recipe from Casa Moro, I changed it to suit what I had (the original used little white beans), which was soggy chick peas, lots of them.

Amounts are quite loose, you can have it thicker or thinner, just add stock accordingly and you can make it stretch. The amounts below feed 3 ish.

Soak 375g chickpeas/cannellini beans overnight with a pinch of bicarbonate of soda (I think it stops the farts), drain, and boil in fresh water for about an hour, until you can easily squish with your fingers. When you drain them, keep the liquid you boiled them in, this will be your base. If you forget (like in a pouring the gravy down the drain moment) jut use some good stock, either way you need about 1.5ltrs of liquid*. Liquidise the beans/chickpeas in their liquid or stock, you want the consistency of double cream, so best to hold back and add more liquid if needed. Now in another large saucepan, heat about 4tbsp olive oil and fry four chopped cloves of  garlic, but be careful not to burn. Add two hand fulls of chopped flat leaf parsley, cook for another minute and add a tsp of hot paprika. Mix in the beans/chickpeas that you just wizzed up. Heat a separate small frying pan, and dry fry a good handful of chorizo (ideally cooking variety) that you have chopped up into little cubes. The oil will soon ooze out. Make them nice and crispy. Season the hell out of your soup, it can take a fair bit of salt, ladle into bowls and top with the chorizo and a generous sprinkling of more chopped parsley.

This soup will be your friend, but it might not make you friends as you may pong of garlic a bit. But who needs friends when you have meat croutons in soup?

*Yes, quantities here are more of a guide, it's soup, not rocket science.

Aloo Gobi - The Mighty Cauliflower at it's best

I love meat. I eat a lot of meat. According to general recommendations I eat far too much meat. The idea of

No animals were harmed in the making of this.

vegetarianism fascinates me and terrifies me slightly, yet I love vegetables, and if a dish is interesting enough, in terms of texture and flavour, I don't miss the meat. I slurped on the most incredible Hot Pot in China once, and it was only when I'd finished that I realised it was completely veggie. I liked that, and I think you should enjoy food enough to not have look for something that's 'missing'. I have recently been trying to eat meat free once a week (when the Boyfriend is out, heaven forbid I try to give him rabbit food) and it's generally Indian themed, I find there is so much variety and it's all so delicious. Cooking without meat is cheaper and I always feel good for it.

Aloo gobi is more often than not a side dish picked at during feast at an Indian restaurant, but eating it on it's own with a chapati or two, you can really appreciate it for the delicious and satisfying dish it is. A recent trip to India has confirmed my obsession with Indian food, I just can't get enough.

Feeds two. In a medium sized saucepan fry a chopped onion in a decent splash of vegetable oil until it's browning at the edges, but not burnt! Add a couple of finely chopped cloves of garlic and fry for another 2 minutes. Add a generous tsp of garam masala and Kashmiri chilli powder, a pinch of salt, and fry for another minute. Add one large roughly chopped tomato and let it cook down for a few minutes, then add two medium potatoes, peeled and chopped into smallish cubes (I had some baby new potatoes to use up which were great). Pour in about 200ml water, bring to the boil and simmer, turn heat down, cover and cook until the potatoes are nearly done, about 7 minutes. At this point throw in half a head of cauliflower broken into small florets, mix in, and cook for another 6 minutes or so, with the lid half on, until everything is cooked but the cauliflower retains a little bite. It should have sauce but not be too wet so remove lid and let it reduce if it looks a bit sloppy. Sprinkle with chopped coriander. This is heaven with a couple of chapatis and a dollop of natural yoghurt.

Devour, feel self righteous, then look in the freezer to see what meat you can take out for tomorrow's dinner.

And a partridge in a... roasting pot.

I have a confession. I've shot partridge many times, but never really got into eating them. A surplus of pheasant is the usual happy situation and so, when faced with a freezer full of partridge, I was keen to do the pretty little birds proud. Each bird feeds one person perfectly, and makes a great alternative to a roast chicken on a Sunday evening. This recipe is super simple and surprisingly quick, a one pot wonder (apart from veg) which is perfect when cooking dinner having had a few sharpeners down the local before hand.

Feeds two. Pre-heat the oven to 200c. In an oven proof casserole or deep baking tray, heat a glug of olive oil and brown two oven-ready partridge all over, seasoning as you go. Take the birds out and add two large hand-fulls of baby potatoes, or diced normal ones, along with a  couple of bashed garlic cloves. Move them around in the oil and give them a blast in the oven for 5 minutes. Meanwhile, stuff each partridge with a big knob of butter, a few sprigs of thyme and sage (or rosemary if you'd rather). Return them to the pot/tray, nestling them in with the potatoes and roast for 15-20 minutes, basting occasionally and give the potatoes a bit of a roll around. Prepare whatever veg you want with it and get stuck in. I kind of forgot to make gravy from the pan but the meat was so moist it didn't really matter.

You might need to go a bit caveman on the partridge, especially to get the meat off the legs, but it should be juicy and delicious. Pick it up with your hands and just go for it.

Beige Food Isn't Always Awful - Cauliflower & Parmesan Soup

Everyone loves a comedy tea cup right?

Yes, yes, it's November and it's getting chilly and oh how lovely is all that kale in the shops, and isn't slow cooking amazing blah blah blah. Anyone with the slightest interest in food and cooking knows this, yet every year it's rammed down our throats with almost as much enthusiasm as January diets. It's true though, we do need something to warm us up, a fresh zingy salad just isn't what we need or want, and though a big fat stew might be a bit much for lunch, soup provides us with endless opportunities to eat cheaply, use up bits from the fridge, saving room for 6 hour ox cheek for dinner. Don't get stuck in a soup rut though; so many times I dismiss soup as being mundane (although I when I was a child it was the only thing I'd order in a restaurant) but then I give it a go and don't regret it. Branch out and try something new, leek and potato is great and all that but 'meh'. 

Feeds 2 with a bit leftover for another day, so 3 really. In a large saucepan gently fry a chopped onion in a generous knob of butter until completely soft. Add a chopped clove of garlic and a head of cauliflower broken into little florets. Give it a good stir to slick it with the melted butter and add approximately one litre of chicken stock (just add some water if you don't have enough). Pop the lid on, bring to the boil and let it simmer for about 7 minutes, until the cauliflower is of school dinner worthy texture. Season very generously, it will take a lot of salt, and grate in some nutmeg*, maybe half a reaspoon, again, you can be quite generous. Once cooled a little, blitz with a stick blender until mostly smooth (I have no problem with a lump or two, but you might), stir in a good handful of grated Parmesan and check for seasoning. Pour into bowls or over-sized mugs and add some garlicky croutons, or go all out and make mini cheese on toasts to float on top. Do sprinkle with extra Parmesan though. 

It might not knock your socks off but it will make you feel good and sometimes that is more important. 

*Whatever you do make sure you grate the nutmeg fresh, don't buy powdered stuff. Nutmeg lasts for ages and the fresh stuff is sooo potent and lovely. And you need it for rum punch. Oh is it not normal for rum punch to be a staple requirement?

Arancini - Amazeballs

Delicious golden balls

Leftover risotto is never a joy to behold. Cold and congealed, what was delicious and comforting is now,
quite frankly,  a bit gross. Well praise the Italian food gods who invented arancini for this precise reason. The clever folk from Sicily decided that if you are going to go to the trouble of making risotto, you might as well make a bit extra and make something else with it. Something delicious and round and deep fried, AND with an oozy cheesy filling, ohhh yeaaah. Only a fool would make risotto especially for this (that would be me, I've wanted to cook these forever but always forget*) but once you've tried this you'll make risotto by the bucket load, so you can whip up this delightful snackette at a moments notice. Mushroom risotto seems to be favoured for this, but I think any type would work, just make sure it's not too wet and there are no big chunks of anything, you want exactly the congealed, un-appetising stodge you get left over from fresh risotto. I won't bore you with a recipe for risotto, use  this one if you're in need of one, and replace mushrooms with chicken and leave out the tarragon. About 250g of uncooked aborio rice made enough for 15 balls. Yes this recipe is loose, but it's the method which is important.

 Make sure your risotto has been chilled for at least an hour, a few days is fine if it was supper the other night. Stir a beaten egg, two for a really big batch, into the cold risotto. Chill again for ten minutes or so. Take a flat tray/large plate and cover in cling film. Spoon some risotto into your hand and roll into a large golf ball. It's a bit sticky but just go with it. Make an indent right into the middle with your little finger and insert a little cube of some delicious Italian soft-ish cheese. I used Fontina but Mozzarella would be awesome too. Cover up the hole, and roll your perfect sphere in breadcrumbs. Carefully place on your plate/tray and keep going until there is no more rice. You may need to wash your hands half way through as it gets messy. Chill them until you need them, at least half an hour though. When you want to eat them, half fill a medium heavy bottomed saucepan with vegetable oil (you only just need to cover the balls) and heat until anything dipped into the oil goes bonkers. Gently place the arancini in the pan, don't over fill, and let them bubble away for about 3/4 minutes, until golden brown, give them a nudge every now and again to get an even colour. Do them in batches, roll on kitchen roll and keep warm on a rack in a low oven, don't put them on a plate, the rack helps them stay crispy.

When they are all cooked, have fun arranging them artfully, and make sure that you warn the recipients that the middle might be hotter than the sun.

*I've also wanted to do a sweet version with left over rice pudding which would just be shamazing, this will happen soon. Just imagine it for pudding...